Thursday, May 29, 2014

CODFISH: The hidden pests of online dating

Sometimes I wonder if the odds are against me. I live in a city that is brimming with single men. Literally the cup floweth over. I don't believe that more means more options though, I believe more means I am forced to wade through more bull-shiat.

I would never say I hate where I live, I love it actually. I love my apartment, I love my little dog, and I love my tight group of friends. All of these things keep me grounded, keep me happy, keep me sane, but I will say I have felt the strong pains of loneliness from time to time. So I must do what any sane, busy, overworked girl in Los Angeles would do; meet new men online. Talk about searching for a needle in a mountain sized haystack. There are a lot of turds in that pile.

After my long string of hopelessness and frustration I went online and created a new online profile. First, I figured why not? Even if I can't find anything suitable I can at least chat a bit with someone and feel not so lonley and second I thought, what could go wrong. The answer was.... A LOT COULD GO WRONG.

I will never knock on online dating mainly because I know too many people who use it and have found love and friendship (myself included). But I will knock on the massive pervs floating like a virus beneath the surface in a guise of sweet man looking for a date. A catfish is someone who dupes you, who takes advantage of your honest nature and makes you believe they are someone they are not.  There is another deplorable specimen on these sites though and I dub them: codfish. These stinky nasty little pests fly below the radar and it always takes me several days to figure out their motives but I found a devious way to keep these bastards in check.

What is a Codfish? Well, it's not the deliciously tasty fish you eat at the dinner table, no. An online dating codfish is a pest, an annoyance, a pretentious ass-hat that forces his ideas onto you without you even wanting or asking for it. In other words, a Codfish is a man that sends unwarranted dick pics. You are in the middle of a decent conversation and then BAM, full body nude picture centered on his valuable pride and joy. Why! Why I ask! I did not ask for this, I didn't even want this. Why in all that is holy and good would you send this to me and force your image into my brain when I didn't want it in the first place.

I have experienced this strange phenomenon more than I would like to admit. It's strange, infurriating, disrespectful, and seriously annoying. I don't think men realize that I DON'T WANT OR NEED TO SEE THEIR MAN PARTS especially if I have never met them and am in no way shape of form in a relationship with them. Not only that,  most women don't work like men. We don't see a picture and think, "ohh that's sexy!" and then proceed to get turned on. It doesn't work like that, especially if I don't even know who I am really talking to. The point of online dating is meeting people I don't know. And the point of chatting with someone before I meet them is to make sure they are actually who they say they are. I don't want to be catfished, but close behind that desire is I DON'T WANT TO BE CODFISHED EITHER!!!!

Here is an example of what I am talking about:
DUDE: How is your day going
DUDE: Is it sunny like usual in So Cal?
(several minutes go by....)
CHIC: WTH, that is so uncalled for!
DUDE: you don't like?
DUDE: To big for ya?
CHIC: I didn't need to see that. I don't need to be disrespected by someone I don't even know.
DUDE: I was just showing you what I got
DUDE: Relax
CHIC: Please don't message me again
DUDE: your a prude
CHIC: *you're
CHIC: nice try though
DUDE: no wonder your single
CHIC: again *you're
DUDE: i have a big dick, don't you want to see it?
CHIC: No, I don't. Please, stop talking to me.
DUDE: why are you being so stuck up?
CHIC: You are offending me and I don't like it. I asked you to stop, can you please respect that?
DUDE: You are still talking to me, it means you like it. Should I send another?
CHIC: You are quite easy to find on facebook...and look at that, there is your mother.
CHIC: Should I send her these pictures and messages to see what she thinks.
DUDE: don't
CHIC: I think I might do it anyway since you felt the need to harass me
CHIC: why do you think it's ok to sexually harass girls you don't know
DUDE: I thought you would like it?
CHIC:No, I don't like it. You deserve to have that uncomfortable conversation with your mother
DUDE: Thats not right. Don't be such a bitch
CHIC: It is right. You should know better than to perpetuate rape culture and harassment. I am sick and tired of being treated like this.

(I sited most of this conversation from This really does happen to women, and it's about time we call out the CODFISH)

I know some might find this offensive, and some might say, "no way, that can't be true," but I promise you that it is true. And not only is it true, but it needs to be addressed. It's bad enough to be harassed on the street minding my own business, but now while I am looking for a person to share my life with I must wade through a pile of turds sending me unwarranted pics and messages degrading my value as a woman. No thank you. I won't stand for this, and I hope you won't either!

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

SS: Kismet PT III


I want to rewind time. My heart thrums painfully in my chest and I can feel my vision starting to slip traction on the matte object in front of me. I want to go back, I want to rewind, but I am stuck in the motion of this path my body is hurtling down. The ache in my chest now feels like a full on heart attack, I think I might be dying or maybe I just want this moment to end. I want to close my eyes and erase it all. I want this day to disappear, I want this moment to disintegrate, I wish I could go back and keep myself from leaving that damn party.

Logan was a charmer. He was tall enough for me to have to crane my neck slightly as I looked up toward his smiling face while we chatted outside of the party house. My friend had ditched me, my ride to the party had also ditched me, I was on my last leg of patience when I tripped out of the smokey house and found Logan standing in the shadows. So mysterious and intriguing, there was no question in my mind that I wanted to talk to him. I didn't really think twice when he asked if I was ready to leave and offered to give me a ride home. Rationalizing that I had pepper spray on me just in case eased my mind as he walked me toward his car.

"You live far?" he asked as he hopped off the curb toward a deserted alley way across the street. My alarm sensors went off in a spark of awareness. Alley way....dark...alone....crap.

"Not too far, just over the hill really." My voice only shook slightly, but I kept my cool together and moved slowly behind him beneath the dull glow of the street light. At the moment we were at the base of the famous Beverly Hills though by the looks of it you would never guess. There was a broken glass bottle hanging in the dry grassy gutter and as I crossed the street a random bum yelled, 'nice tush!' but I couldn't really tell if he was yelling it at me or the hunky leather jacket wearing man in front of me.

Logan flicked the butt of his cigarette in a pinwheel toward the dry gutter letting it land in a spray of ash and sparks before dying beside the abandoned broken glass. Beverly Hills is truly so very classy.

"You ok wearing a helmet?"

My first immediate response was, "huh?" thinking why I would need a helmet in a car but the thought died in my throat when I looked at his ride. No wonder he was wearing a leather jacket, he rode a matte black Harley Davidson. It looked like the stealth bike of an underground mafia member. Logan was anything but a mafia member. His long blonde hair and steely blue eyes projected surfer boy more than Italian mob wise guy.

"Yeah, I would like to if that's what I'm going to be riding home in...on," I said quickly trying really hard not to show that I had never before been on two wheel contraption of death and destruction.

Logan smiled heartily and moved toward me to hand me the helmet to which I just stared at. He took his cue and plopped it on my head before buckling the strange leather pieces beneath my chin. It felt like the ground was starting to rumble beneath my legs but I quickly realized it was just the thrumming power of the engine placed so dangerously close Logan's seat. I was terrified to say the least.

The look on Logan's face was absolutely priceless. "I promise you Grace, I will drive slow and make sure you are safe. Just make sure to hold on tight ok?"

My vision bobbed up and down but I wasn't quite sure I made my head move or if the helmet's weight had snapped the muscles in my neck making me jiggled my head in a nonsensical jello like fashion. He took it as a yes and practically pulled me on the bike behind him. He rattled off a few words of warning to which I understood not a single syllable of it. The one thing I did hear was, "HOLD ON TIGHT!" He grabbed hold of each of my hands and secured them around his waist.

Tight was an understatement, I had a death grip on his body that even a bucking rhino couldn't get out of. I felt every single breath he took, though I wasn't sure if it was  more exaggerated because of my death lock around his abdomen. He didn't mention any concerns, and by the face that ten minutes into the ride he was still sitting upright instead of fainting off the side of the bike was a good sign.

"HEY!" He yelled over his shoulder as we winded down the Sepulveda back road toward the Valley. "ARE YOU HUNGRY?"

Surprisingly I was. It was also almost 5 in the morning and I could feel the effects of hunger starting to dig into the pit of my stomach. "Yeah! I could eat." I was pretty confident he heard my chirp. The death bike pulled off the residential road and onto the main strip of Ventura Blvd. It looked like a ghost town.

The engine purred subtly at a stop light and Logan angled his neck to look over his shoulder at me. "You look pretty cute in that helmet." He smirked and I knew full well he was full of shit. I looked like  tiny bug with a head five sizes too large. If cute was what he wanted to call it though, I would take it.

"Thanks," I replied softly. "Where are you taking me?"

"To where every man wants to be when he is awake at 5 in the morning."

My stomach dropped toward my knees. "Excuse me?"

"To a Diner Grace, I'm taking you to a breakfast Diner. Relax, it's way to early in the day to take you home with me," he said with a smirk and a saucy wink. Men like him shouldn't be allowed to saucily wink, it was aggravating and also slightly encouraging. The big leather encased man was growing on me.

We stopped at one of my absolute favorite cafe's in Sherman Oaks The Crave Cafe. It was where I stopped for most of my secluded down time and much needed pile of strawberry crepes. Plus their coffee was spot on delicious and perfectly crammed with delicious sugary sweetness. He didn't even need to ask and he knew the best place in my stomping grounds. As he pulled in to a small section of parking just in front of the place I wondered allowed where he lived.

"Actually not to far from her. I'm just a little ways back up Sepulveda."

I didn't ask any further questions and he didn't offer any but that was a very telling sentence. Only those in houses lived on the far South side of Ventura, and usually only those with a good grip of cash could afford it. As annoying as it is to admit the idea of him having a good sense of financial responsibility intrigued me more, but it wasn't the money that I liked, it was the sense that he knew how to take care of himself. He knew how to live comfortably and responsibly. It's one of the main qualities I looked for in a man, the other one's are more based on detailed personality traits.

"You ever been here before?" Logan asked conversationally as we walked toward the deserted looking building.

"Yeah, I actually come here a lot to work on my writing and what not," I said trying my best to sound nonchalant. He didn't really respond he merely raised his eyebrows in intrigue as the overly peppy server behind the counter asked what he could get for us. It was 515, no normal person should be allowed to be that peppy at 515 on a Saturday morning.

Logan ordered several random plates saying we could just eat whatever felt good and I ordered a large caramel latte. The foam and caramel mix tasted like heaven as the velvety drink slipped over my tongue and into my empty stomach. I hummed my deep appreciation for the beverage as I settled more comfortable into the wide sofa Logan chose to sit on.

We talked for almost an hour and  half about everything and nothing. He seemed so well verse and intriguing. I truly didn't want the evening/ morning to end, but I had plans with a girlfriend of mine later that day and he had other obligations too.

"Thank you so much for breakfast," I said softly almost slightly embarrassed because he had just asked me for my number.

I should state ahead of time that when I become embarrassed and or a little shocked/giddy about a moment I tend to lose all simple functions of my motor skills. My lips can no longer form coherent words and my smile tends to twitch in it's angst ridden desire to stay wide and pleasing. It makes me come across as a total dweebie nerd that for the most part has cause a lot of trauma in the past, but I learn from my mistakes.

After Logan's smooth digit asking question I excused myself to the restroom to shake out the nerves and twitchy muscles that were jolting through my body a mile a minute. I needed air, I needed to breath, I need to calm the frack down! Logan said no worries as I rushed away in a panic of jitters calling out that he would meet me outside.

Once I was able to violently shake away my ridiculous tremors I shoved my consciousness into my best sex kitten projection and strutted my way toward the front of the cafe. Logan was no where to be seen so I assumed as anyone would that he had also taken a trip to the lavatory (as I like to call in in my head as it sounds so much better than the toilet) while he was waiting for me. In anticipation of riding on the beast of black metal I plucked the heavy helmet from the back of his bike and began the laborious process of shoving the giant plastic piece onto my significantly smaller head. I almost had it in place when I lost my footing on the curb plummeting the six inches to the hard paved street and lunging forward as my shoe connected jarring my ankle harshly to the side. With the helmet still only half on I couldn't quite see what I was doing but my arms jolted out in front of me to keep me from falling flat on my face.

What happened next I couldn't have changed even if I had wanted to, even if I had thoroughly had several minutes to think through the scene before my eyes there was no way around my completely disastrous actions. As I reached forward trying to catch my own fall without the slightest clue of my surroundings my forearms connected jarringly with harsh sun heated metal. Luckily what I connected with stopped my forward motion keeping me from falling forward, but unfortunately as I righted myself and ripped the helmet off of my head I realized what caught my fall.

Logan's beautiful black Harley lay tipped on its side half in the parking area and half on the side of the street. Traffic wasn't so heavy just yet, but there were cars on the road and in a moment of pure panic my body lost control and I started to hyperventilate. "Shit shit shit!!!" I rushed forward and tried to upright the bike but it was far too heavy for me to lift alone. I saw traffic rumbling down the street just a mile or so in the distance and the panic doubled into overdrive. My stomach seized in fear of what Logan's reaction would be. I had never in all my life done something so horribly wrong to someone I barely knew. He could very well be an angry person and one tiny scratch on his baby might send him over the edge. I didn't really had time to dwell though as I tried for the third time to lift his bike he strut out of the Cafe. I watched as his brilliant smile flipped down into a troubling frown.

"Um...what the hell?"

My mouth opened and out spilled or torrent of rambling apologies and words that even I had a hard time understanding. Logan remained silent. He walked over toward me and lifted the bike out of my hands in one jerk of motion. Rushing over to the other side Logan inspected the outer surface looking for possible defects, scratches, or permanent damage. His pristine matte paint job looked like a scratched pock marked chalk board.

"I am so so sorry Logan. I really didn't mean to. I was trying to put the helmet on and I just tripped and fell over! I....I am really sorry."

He didn't say much, and I didn't really expect him to. He was being nice driving me home, and he was being overly nice buying me breakfast. I have to say I felt really bad right up until he yanked the helmet out of my hands and jammed it down on his own head. His leg lunged over the side of the bike and with a stomp of his foot the beast roared to life. I didn't actually expect him to be nice toward me after I just dumped his bike over into a pile of sharp and unforgiving rocks but I really didn't think he would be such a prick either.

He shook his head in my direction and I could swear I heard him say something, but he peeled away from the curb before I could really comprehend.

I stood there for several minutes before the shock wore off and the anger set in and I realized that he had just ditched me on the side of the road without a ride home. Thankfully I was only a few miles from my apartment complex. A walk would be perfect to work off not only my breakfast but also my anger.

I vowed then and there to never EVER go to another show with my friend Diamond again and matte Black motorcycles were strictly OFF LIMITS!

UPDATE: Three weeks later I remembered what Logan said, and I admit it is not appropriate to repeat. But I happened to see him about two weeks after the horrible incident and thankfully I was looking mighty fine if I must say so myself. Amazingly he approached me and apologized profusely. He said there was no damage to his precious bike and that he was hoping I could forgive him for being such a prick and ditching me. He asked me out to dinner.

Outwardly I thanked him for his apology and sweetly told him no, I was not interested. Inwardly I was jumping up and down in a fit of joy at my sweet delicious retribution. My 'no' gave him the distinct expression that I had just peed in his Cheery-O's. Not so cheery now are you mister ass hat! No thank you, I will not be going on a date with you, and you can thank Kismet for that one.

Monday, May 26, 2014

A Morning in the Life of THE DUDE

It started out like any other day, but something amazing happened. I swear it boggled my little noddle.

I'm getting ahead of myself, I should start out at the beginning. My name is Dude, or The Dude to be specific and I am a Pug. Yeah, I know I snort and have issues breathing, but watch it I will sneeze boogers in your face if you call me flat face, snub nose, or schnookums (that last one is only directed at my human, I sneeze in her face every day but she doesn't seem to understand the meaning of EMBARASSING!!!)

So anyways, today I woke like any other day. My head poked out from under the blanket to welcome the new day! I really had to pee but I had a minor set back. I walked up to my human and she was snoring quite viciously. I hit her across the head to snap her out of it but she continued the rattling breath of a sleeping dragon. Maybe hitting her head wasn't the right idea so I angled for a different tactic.I attacked her face with what she calls "kisses" and what I call covering her face in delicious slobber. She then stumbled out of bed and I attacked her legs with excited jumping trying to keep her sleep riddled mind on track.

Me: "Outside human, lets go outside. I have to pee. Lets go outside. No we are not making get out of the little room with the white seat. WHATS TAKING SOOOOO LONG. I have to peeeeeeee."

Finally, I reluctantly sat while she attached the silly leading rope to my neck (because we all know she would get lost if I didn't drag her around the block. There is no way her nose could find the way home) and then I was free to take my human on her walk.

Remember I was telling you about the super amazing event that occurred? Well on this typical walk as I peed on every foul smelling rock, bush, tree, pole, flower, blade of grass, speck of dust, and fire hydrant I saw the most amazing thing.
Me: "HUMAN, look I am HUGE! I told you I was huge!"
Human: "What is it Dude?"
Me: "I'm ginormous look at these legs!!!"
Human: "Are you barking at your shadow again?"
Me: "I don't know what that means. But I know that I am a BEAST!"

 Me: "Seriously how can you not see how cool this is. I'm like eight feet tall!!!"

When we returned home my human shuffled off to the little room and came out smelling like bottled flowers and wet human. You would think after a shower humans would smell good, but nooooooo, they smell like artificial plants. And they think I smell bad? self respecting dog would ever want to smell like Lavender.
 After the walk I was feeling pretty great about my life, all in all it was a fantastic weekend morning. Even my breakfast tasted superb.

Human: "You wanna take a picture with me little man, come here!"

I wasn't even half way done with my breakfast but I love my little human and if she wants pictures I will allow her to snap away at my super handsome mug. Something awesome happened around picture four though.

I remembered what I ate the night before.....
Me: "Smell that cheese human!! It's a special one just for you!"
Human: "Damn Dude! That smells!"
Me: "I know, my brand is highly potent."

There is nothing like landing a fresh fart right on your humans leg. What a morning!!

Friday, May 23, 2014

Day of Random Randomness

Today is Friday and I have dubbed it Day of Random Randomness

I was told way back when, which I'm pretty sure was a Wednesday (shout out to DC there),  that I was going to be named Dorthy Shirley. I'm pretty positive I would have been ridiculed in the sand box while the children around me threw rocks at my head and screamed, "You are SHIRLEY DORKY!!!" Thank you Mom, for not letter that disaster happen :)

Not sure if that is actually a rock...or a piece of blackish looking poo. Hmmm....pondering now.

I have decided in my own personal time of thought that when it comes to most movie/book series I most often love the first and the last one the most. I wonder if that is a common thing, or if anyone out there actually thoroughly loves book number 2. It's almost like the middle book is the red headed step child of writing, the evil set of pages that everyone wants to forget exists.
In order of LOVE, I will say the last two books of Harry Potter are preferred over the middle four and five. The first three somewhat make one long awesome beginning...the last two are the climax END!! Lord of the Rings, totally different though. I love the first one the most, the last one second most, and I seem to always forget about the middle one until I am watching the movies and I think...."I can't wait until the Ents FIGHT!!!!!

That most definitely is a HUGE ROCK!!!

MOOOOOOOOOOVIES...I can't stop thinking about all the new movies I want to see in the next couple of months. There are soo many! Some of my friends who aren't as movie obsessed as I am probably think I'm crazy when I text them mid day screaming something like..."HAVE YOU SEEN THE NEW TRAILER FOR...BLAH blah BLAh!? IT'S AMAZING!!!!" (Yes, I text shouty cap people when I am really overly excited)
I'm not sure if it's because I love being involved with the process of making movies, or avidly watching the day to day updates, but I love seeing things before they happen. I like being the first to know. I will admit, when it comes to spoilers, I am the worst to myself. Basically I read too many movie blogs and updates.

Here were some other options, but I think aesthetically and Jessica "nerd" Girl needed a Harry Potter fix for some time :)

OPTION ONE.....because PUG!!!!!!

OPTION TWO....because I have a secret lego storm trooper hiding inside my keyboard!!!

OPTION THREE....because dark and mysterious nerdiness coolness

Random Fun Fact: Did you know that Frack has been officially added to the Websters Dictionary? If you don't know what that means, you need to get on some Battlestar Gallactica watching!

Happy Super Random Friday People....have a super awesome weekend <3

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Aggro Thursday

Yesterday I felt like there wasn't enough time in the day, today I feel like time is ticking at a cruel snails pace. I was filled with excitement and wonder yesterday morning, I was energized to work on my 3D, excited that I just finished updating my website, and invigorated to read through the third pass of The Manny. Today however, I'm frustrated and annoyed. I can't work on my 3D because I am at work and have no availability to access the right programs. My website is updated to the most recent information, nothing to do there until I have something to update. The Manny, I can work on that now yes, but it's almost impossible to focus on the organic flow of ideas, words, and foreshadowing when I'm surrounded by the loudest of loud noises!!!
 I think the crux of my issues on this momentously mediocre day is that I feel stuck. I feel like no matter how many strides I take forward I fall backward at least several more. Up the hill, almost there, I can see the horizon and then a magically evil whoosh of wind and I am back to the bottom again. Here is why: I need a more challenging job/career and I can't seem to land one. The first thing people usually say to me after this topic comes up is; "Have you looked at Craigslist?" Or even better, "Have you applied anywhere? You really should updated your linkedin."

It boggles my mind when people, whether they are strangers or close friends and family tell me obvious information that if they actually thought I didn't do would mean they thought I was incapable of...thinking. The truth, I have done this myself in other instances. It comes down to the problem, and the victim. I am the one with the problem, so I must be the one to fix it. Others can give advice and their opinions, but truly I am the only one that can fix this problem. (However if one more person tell me to look at Craigslist I might donkey punch them....or pee in their cereal. Either one.)

So to fix my problem I need a plan.....

I need to find someone who works somewhere that I want to work and then hassle, bug, annoy, and drive insane until they finally give up and hire me. 

Good Plan? Well, the people that know me probably think no...especially since I have already implemented this plan.

My point is, that you can't reach any high point of stature without knowing someone. I look at people who are famous, popular, rich, established, accomplished....they got to where they are because they had an in. Some legitimately work their ass off for their "product" but in truth, even if you are truly amazing, unless you have a contact to get you that dream job how else would you have gotten it? Jobs aren't made or instituted for complete strangers, your dream career is yours because what's her/his name promoted you. Sometimes this is awesome!! Sometimes this is a huge pain in the arse.

My new plan....



And only cakes based off of Harry Potter because that is ridiculously cool!

No plan (after ingesting a pound or 12 of cake) is to work when I can on what I want to accomplish. I really want to learn more about my industry, so I am going to take the time to do that when I have to availability. I am going to finish the third edit of The Manny and work toward getting it published by the end of the year. I am going to learn two new programs this year, I am hoping to make that Nuke and Smoke (If you don't know what that is, I want to be more efficient in VFX programs).

So new new plan is in effect NOW!.......but but why is the cake gone? (ANY OTHER JUNK FOOD CRAZY IDEAS??? I NEED OPTIONS PEOPLE!!!!!)

Friday, May 2, 2014

The Girl Nerd Book Review!!

For the last couple of months I have been on a reading frenzy! Maybe it’s because my book is almost finished and I like to see what a polished (or totally unpolished) product looks like. Apparently the last 20 something years did nothing to help me know “what a finished book” or “what a really really good book” looks like. Best way to understand your craft is to immerse yourself in it right? I did…I have been a readin’!!!!

First up is probably my favorite book. No joke this one hits the numero uno spot on my list:

The Martian, by Andy Weir
I love good suspense, I always find myself wanting to dive into the latest thriller action book. This one takes the cake of nail bitter story. It’s a science fiction, suspense, nail bitingly tense, oh my god I CAN’T STOP TURNING THE PAGE..... kind book. You start out with the main character Mark Watney (Who in my mind resembles someone like Domhnall Gleeson….no idea why. Mark isn’t a red head, and he is an American. But anyways that’s the face I imagined). So this Mark Watney guy, who is a total nerd in the coolest way, starts the story with an OH SHIT moment. He is completely stranded on Mars. He spends the next so many days (no need to spoil here!) trying to stay alive. The best part about most of his “I have to save my own arse” moments is they seem completely one hundred percent scientifically legit. There wasn’t a single time I thought, “No way, that just isn’t possible.” But then again, who am I to question a Mechanical Engineer/Botonist? Weir really twists a great story in with the on the edge moments, and he adds enough crazy wild “AHHHHH run for your life,” in with the “oh my god that is the funniest thing I have ever read,” that you never get bored. Even when he was talking his science mumbo jumbo I was hooked. This is a serious page turner, seriously funny, and on my top list as MUST READ!!!! Does Mark Watney ever make it home??? You will have to read this one to find out.

 Second book on my must read list:

If I Stay, by Gayle Forman
Now, a totally different style than The Martian, If I Stay is a heartfelt slightly crushing story of a girl, Mia Hall, who gets in a horrible car accident with her family and through a miraculous state of in-between has the option to choose if she wants to leave all her loved ones behind, or if she wants to stay. (That isn’t a spoiler there, it’s on the back of the book pretty much). This is one of those books that doesn’t follow an A-Z timeline, it jumps back and forth through Mia’s life highlighting people she loves and why mean so much to her. Forman does a great job with the back and forth, I never lost myself in the timeline she supplied, it flowed so perfectly with the main characters arch that it was perfectly executed. This book kinda reminds me of The Perks of Being a Wallflower in that it focuses a lot of attention on music and how it changes our lives. Perhaps that’s why I love it so much! I originally picked up this book because I saw the trailer starring Chloe Grace Moretz. I got really excited and thought, “I need to read this before I see the movie!” I was right, this is a must read. There will be so many entities of this book that they won’t be able to get across through film. It’s definitely a tug on the heart strings kinda book, but it’s so beautiful written and focused that I have to put it on a top list of must read. One thing I will say, I actually enjoyed the sequel to this book. The author really knows how to pull you in deep with music, lyrics, and emotion and she fills the page with numerous quotable lines. I have a feeling this be a re-read in my near future.

 Third Book on my must read list:

The Fault in Our Stars, by John Green
“Why John, why must you yank on my heart strings so harshly!!!!” My first reply (because yes I spoke out loud to the author when I read this one) when I finished the book. This one isn’t a surprise knock you sideways book, you know it’s going to be a ‘rough on the emotions’ read. Hazel Lancaster is a young girl who from the beginning you know has a difficult path in front of her, she has cancer and it isn’t going away. She struggles through her day to day lugging around a breathing machine just so that she can stay alive, but she ends up meeting a fellow cancer patient at a support group, and from there things get interesting. I will say this book from the beginning seemed like just another sad story, but I will tell you that I have NEVER read a more truly inspirational and quotable book in my life! (outside of books that are quoted all the time, those don’t count) This story is corky and sweet, the plot is simple but severely intense, and the characters are beyond lovable. Every page kept me wondering how it would end, every page made me ache and feel for the characters’ lives. If the story itself doesn’t grab you, then watch the MOVIE. Shailene Woodley is starring in it!! I dare you to try and watch the trailer for this amazing story and not shed a glistening tear…I failed miserably.


Ok, that wraps my MUST READS for the moment. I promise I will have more soon, I can’t seem to keep my nose out of books lately. Perhaps that’s because I am waiting for own to be edited….not pointing fingers, just saying. ;) (I love you editor!)