Monday, December 23, 2013
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Just a quick little note.....
I JUST FINISHED THE FIRST DRAFT OF BOOK ONE IN MY TRILOGY!!!!!!!!!!!
At the moment I am so full of elation and excitement I can't even contain it. That may change in a few weeks when my editor gets hold of this...dun dun dun. I am so excited, and proud that I reached my deadline. This is one of the best feelings I have ever had :)
Monday, December 16, 2013
I feel like disasters always strike in three, and it’s not a rumor or a saying that your grandmother tells you. Honestly, disaster strikes me down in sets of three. Then again, my sets of three have been triplicated toward the end of this year, maybe my threes are now striking in threes? Ah crap, this doesn’t bode well for me…
First set of three…
1) Let’s go back to June right before my birthday, I was struck in the heart with a dagger. I want to say over the years I have learned to guard my heart and emotions well, but this time I failed. Shot to the heart, and he was to blame, he gave love a BAD NAME!!!!
2) I got really really sick around the end of September/early October. I thought I could manage, but I woke up on a Monday morning and thought I was going to die. I ended up having to go to the emergency room, buuuuuut disaster number three was right around the corner…..
3) For some reason I didn’t get my name added to my benefits package. Not sure (seriously I have no idea how this happened but that’s a whole different debate) how this came to be, but needless to say I called my benefits people and I was denied. SOooo 260 dollars later I had my doctor’s appointment and medication to get better.
The up side to my first set of horrors…I found a lot of extra time to write. I owe a lot to my struggles and down time because it always enables me to reflect and think about my past, mistakes, goals, achievements, desires…when I am at my lowest, the artistic thought and talented wonder living inside of me comes to life with a vengeance. YOU ARE STRUGGLING JESSICA?! NOOOOO…ARTISTIC WONDER TO THE RESCUE, LETS WRITE, DRAW, PAINT, READ, LIVE AND BREATH TO CREATE A MASTERPIECE!!!! (Yes, my internal monologue sounds like a crazed artistic super hero).
Second set of three…
1) My poor poooor car. It has seen better days, and as much as I hate when stuff happens to my vehicle and curse it for the blasted hunk of machinery it is. So I was driving down the freeway, and BAM, blown out tire. Luckily I was close to my apartment, didn’t have to hobble along too far. Called my friends AAA, and I got my spare put on. Yes I can change a tire, and yes I tried, but damn those lug nuts for being stuck on my wheel like the superset of super glues!
2) One morning I was driving down the freeway trying to get home to get ready for work and up ahead I notice what looks like a piece of foam flying through the air. I swear it looked completely weightless, flying through the wind like it weighed nothing at all. It was heading straight for my car and the second before it hit me I thought….crap, that is so not foam. That’s a rock the size of my head….BAM!!! My windshield shatters and cracks into a million tiny pieces glass flies all over my passenger seat and I am left (STILL DRIVING, I AM ON THE FREEWAY!!!) staring ahead in a state of massive shock repeating, “that totally was not a piece of foam!”
3) So this last one breaks my heart. I bought this beautiful little Honda Fit with the intentions of it lasting me forever! Honda…they are good cars. But me, I of course am on a record breaking bad luck streak and my poor little Finch (the name of my little black and blue speedster) didn’t stand a chance. On my way to some overtime work, driving down the freeway I notice my check engine light come on…then I notice my car won’t accelerate, then I notice that I am slowing down at a rapid speed. I smash the hazard light button and struggle to pull my car to the side of the road on a super busy freeway. Long story short…My head gasket blew and now I need a whole new engine. Ugh…
The upside, though not as easily found as the first one, I realized how many people in my life are willing to help me through my struggles. My family, friends, coworkers, all rallied together to help me get from place to place when I was without a hope of working out my schedule. Sometimes it takes a totally disaster to realize who truly cares for you, who will be there for you when you need. Those moments in life though hard should always be cherished. I have a wonderful family and friend base, I wouldn’t be as relieved and happy without them. They are my solid gold support net.
Third of three….
1) They always say, back it up…back it up…when you are working on something super important BACK IT UP. First fail…I did not
2) After writing all day on one of my chapters for my Manny, I seriously was struggling through one scene. But finally I finished it and was happy where I got with it. I saved it on my LAPTOP and then closed down for the day. I had other things going on….but disaster struck in several ways. This particular day was one of those…I can’t seem to do anything right kinda days which in itself is a fail. Not a total disaster, but mini little “damn it!” moments. Needless to say I was annoyed a little
3) Now this one still hurts, and I am still a little annoyed with myself for not doing what I always do. BACK IT UP…..while watching a movie that night with my friends, my poor little laptop crashed and displayed the BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH!!! 2,000 words that I had written that morning for my Manny were gone into the void of crashed hard drives. Lost forever, and never to come back again.
It’s at this moment when I broke down and cried (on the inside this time) because I was just so fed up with everything going wrong. Pissed is a great way to explain it, I was so angry!! So this time, I would say I didn’t have a oh my life is better moment, I didn’t have a “oh my family and friends are the best” realization. This time I was pissed and angry at technology and wanted to punch something, drink a beer, and watch a great movie. THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I DID…..I punched my couch cushions until my dog started to bark at me, I drank a deliciously hoppy IPA, and then I settled into the couch with my roomie and watched Love Actually. Maybe my last problems weren’t really resolved, I have a lot of writing to catch up on and my due date is at the end of the week!!! But….who doesn’t love watching Hugh Grant shake his Prime Minister butt to the jazzy pop tune of Jump (for my love) by the Pointer Sisters. Well done Hugh, you saved my sanity yet again!!
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
My problem: I am obsessed with reading.
There I said it, I love to read, and I will never stop. I crave the words, the flow of a fresh story, the aches and pains of a new life scribbled over the page with such intensity I just can't seem to stop myself. Of course I do it, I turn the page and devour on.
My sneaky action, I read at work. The phone is ringing of course I answer it. Sure I will help you get such and such, hold on one second...I finish my sentence, grab whatever that Producer needs and I am back to the black and white addiction I crave all day long. I need to go to the bathroom, that is just another place of heaven to catch at least five minutes (ok...ok I take longer than five minutes because there is no way I can put the book down long enough to wash my hands and run back to my chair to read more) of good intense reading.
In a bar, heck yeah I read in a bar!! For some reason people seem to interrupt me more in a bar than at work. "Hey there, whatcha reading?" My normal response, "A book." You would think they would leave me to my obsession in blissful peace but they don't, the questions continue. Me being the obsessed reader that I am, I blatantly ignore them and finish my page before looking up at them smiling. "Yes it's a very good book." Head back down into the pages, and I'm off again.
Now, I know what my bestie would be thinking by now. "Jessica, if you are so obsessed why haven't you read the second book of Outlander????" (By which I am dying to start....just FYI) And my response...1) I am supposed to be writing, I am super close to finishing the first draft of my Manny! 2) I need a decent quick easy distraction, not a week of nose in the page can't live a normal life obsession which Outlander deserves because it is AMAZING!!!! I read short books, but good ones, one's with great character development that is about four to five hours of reading before I dive back into my writing with a vengeance.
Here is the deal with me, I have a hard core obsession with reading. It not only gives my brain a break, but it also gives me some new verbiage. You learn a lot about vocabulary just reading, no kidding a lot of new words I spew out are directly from that moment reading a book and I come across a word and think..."What the heck does that mean?" So I look it up, and BAM! New world, mind blown, there is a meaning for that word and it's amazing.
So I have a problem, but I am not looking for a healthy dose of intervention, I am sharing my obsession with you because I hope that you too are as fascinated as I am about words, books, reading...and maybe hopefully one day I will give you that delicious slice of heaven when I am able to publish my own black and white pile of words that make up the running story playing over and over in my mind. Thank you friend for listening to my ramble of words...now please, do what I do, and go pick up a book and jump into the amazing wonder of discovering a new world. I am telling you though, be cautious, you might like it, love it, and become as obsessed as I am.
<----One day I will have a library this epic filled with EVERY BOOK I HAVE EVER READ! Ambitious much, maybe, but I don't care. Some dreams are worth dreaming.
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
I think everyone has a special nerdy geek out moment in their life. A moment when you lose complete control over your senses and you scream, laugh, giggle, clap, dress in silly costumes, smile until your face hurts, cry because you can’t believe it’s happening, and lose all sense of self because you are so wrapped up in the “HOLY JESUS did that just happen!” moment. I think these moments and experiences in our geeky lives should be cherished and treasured, and not only that, they should be celebrated for the awesomeness of what they are.
Today I had a mini HUGE geek out moment. I am at work and a co-worker of mine says, “Hey Jess, isn’t that your boy down there?” At first I thought, That’s strange why is my boyfriend at work? Then I realized who was at work that day and I did an inward, OH MY GOD JASON MOMOA IS HERE TODAY!? I promptly walked out to the kitchen to get my lunch and then beelined it in the opposite direction to see if she was right. Not only did I get to see my super awesome Hollywood crush, but in my small minute long hello conversation I got a hug and a kiss hello. Jason actually remembered me from the first time I met him over a year ago. Needless to say, the smile on my face was a total PERMA GRIN. Then….I gushed. “I’m so happy you guys are almost done with your movie, I really can’t wait to see it, it’s so good to see you too, your hair looks fantastic cut shorter, have an awesome evening Jason, yeah definitely hope to see you again soon too!” I then walked straight to my desk and did a little happy jig telling my boss I got to see “mister awesome beefy cakes” as he refers to him.
The funny think about geek out moments is that they are all yours, and you choose whether or not to give into them or not. Whether or not to embrace the goofy, nerdy, amazing, crazy, weird, artsy thing that is a passion of yours. I love movies, music, and books, I go crazy when I see amazing VFX and 3D graphics in movies, I have a few well deserved Famous people crushes (Jason Momoa “Kahl Drogo”, Jennifer Lawrence, J. J. Abrams, Charlize Theron, Mark Wahlberg, Joss Whedon, J.K. Rowling, Emma Watson, Jeremy Renner….ok maybe there are way more than a few). The point is when I see something I love, something I am really into I can’t help but express it in the geekiest way I know how.
I remember when I was younger and I went to the premier of the first Lord of the Rings and a friend of mine made fun of one of the fans waiting in line to see the first movie. She was wearing an elf costume and elf ears. My friend proceeded to say the girl looked dumb and nerdy, and I being the naïve dummy I was at the time didn’t tell my friend to shove it, which I really should have. That girl was representing her passion with pride, she was showing the world what she loved and not only was she doing a great job of it, she was also ecstatic with pure unadulterated geekiness. I say bravo to her, and I am proud that she was showing her passions without a care of what people thought.
The awesome thing about being a geek is that you can geek out about absolutely anything, you can be a nerd over whatever you feel you love the most and want to celebrate. Comic-con is rad because of the amount of people showing the value of their passion. They go all out for one day of standing in lines and listening to seminars of what’s coming next, or what happened with their latest favorite movie/comic/whatever. The point is, being a geeky nerd is awesome. We don’t care about what people think, we are proud to be who we are. Proud to love what we love. And excited to show our love in every way possible. There is nothing better than to just “Be GEEk”