Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Give me back MY GUM DROP BUTTON!!!

No not the gum drop button!!!

Sometimes I feel like the gingerbread man...or lady I should say. I feel like little pieces of me are ripped off, taken from me, and I struggle to remain in control of myself and my life. Right now I am sick as a dog, and frustrated with certain aspects of my life. My job, my time, my goals, my money, my damn whining dog who won't stop whining no matter how many times I take him outside!!!!!!! Little things, or rather all big things pile into my brain and ripe me apart from the inside out.

Sanity sometimes holds on by a single precarious little thread. There are so many times I want to give up and run back to mommy and daddy (that's right I still call them Mommy and Daddy when the time calls for it!!!) screaming that being an adult totally sucks!! But then I think of my goals, my life aspirations, everything I want from this life and I know that this is a road bump, a really freaking BIG FAT NASTY road bump, the kind that make you go "Holy shit balls did my car just fall apart, that thing was MONSTROUS!! WHERE THE HELL ARE THE TAX PAYER DOLLARS, that needs to be fixed pronto, shit I think my bumper just fell off." Yeah...that is the kind of ROAD BUMP I'm hitting right now, it's more like a ROAD MOUNTAIN...the size of a freaking mansion!!!

Ok, so there it is, my sanity is barely hanging on. What does any of this have to do with anything? I will be the first to admit this shit sucks, BUT....there are some great stories to pull out of struggle. Struggle is the international uniform aspect of life. We all struggle, we're all
on a road to success, fortune and fame, but we all struggle and fail along that path. I know that to fail is to never try, but I feel like I try over and over and over and never move, but that doesn't mean I give up. The one thing I have pulled from my experience is an array of stories, there is so much I have learned about life and myself, I am amazed at how strong a person can be when given the opportunity to AKA...forced into it, because no one in their right mind would CHOOSE to struggle.

But the stories, the emotion, the power of overcoming the struggle. That is why all of this is worth it to me no matter how much I hate it, no matter how many times I replace that damn gum drop button, it will be worth it in the end. I know that I can pull every single struggle into an epic tale...lets just hope that epic tale will entice you enough to want to read it.

December is my deadline...the manny is SOON TO COME!!