Friday, September 20, 2013

Defeat will not defeat me!

Over the many years of working in an artistic field, I have to say, the hardest thing to accomplish isn’t success; it’s the mastery of graciously accepting denial and criticism. I mean that very seriously, you have to be GRACIOUS, completely understanding, open and accepting, there is no room for defensive strategies when working in the art field because it will only dig the failure hole deeper. Many think that to be denied, is to fail. I think the opposite (though trying to talk to me right after I have been denied, I will tell you to shut up and leave me alone!).

I have applied for more jobs than I could possibly count, most don’t even contact me back. Others, I have a phenomenal interview and then…never hear back. OR…I have a phenomenal interview and I do hear back….for them to tell me I didn’t get the job. Denial, they went with someone else, someone who they think is better, which automatically makes me feel…worse. But I know it’s not true, that position just wasn’t for me, and there is something else that I am meant to do (even though at time, I will fight with anyone who tries to tell me differently, “THAT WAS THE PERFECT JOB DAMN IT ALL TO HELL!!!!”)

I am not perfect at this, in fact this is the hardest thing I have had to learn in my life. It’s not easy to look someone in the eye and say “Yes, I understand you don’t want me, yes I understand that you feel someone will work harder, faster, and better than I can.” While the whole time you just want to scream, “YOU ARE AN IDIOT YOU SHOULD HAVE PICKED ME!!!!” But that isn’t very professional is it ;/

Anyways, the point is that all of this epic failure/denial in your life is actually good for you. It has taught me that sometimes you have to reflect and look at the situation from someone else’s perspective. Step outside your tiny little box, and look at the big picture. When it comes to writing I know there will be way more no’s than yes’s, I will have to scrounge around and FIND the person that believes in me and my product. It won’t be easy, and I will have to put in a lot of effort to get what I want but a few thousand bajillion no’s will NEVER stop me from reaching my goals.

…..try saying that to me right after someone said , “No you SUCK!” I won’t listen to you, I will pout and throw something at you. But the next day maybe…maybe even a few hours later when I have time to reflect I can look objectively at my situation. This isn’t the end, I just have to keep moving, keep looking ahead because I will find what I am looking for. I will reach the top of the endless stairs I have been climbing, damn it I WILL BE A SUCCESS!!!!! Failure can completely devastate and destroy you, OR it can make you so damn mad that you work three times as hard to show how much you deserve and will obtain that success.